Not myself

TEDxKatipunanAve yesterday was awe-inspiring, and it left me in such high spirits that I find it utterly strange that today I was uninspired, lethargic, and pessimistic – the complete opposite of what I had been last night. It didn’t help that it was father’s day and I was being sulky (only a bit in front of my family). I suppose that was one reason I decided to pack my work bag–I didn’t want to infect my family with my negativity on such a peaceful and happy day–and head on over to the local Starbucks, the closest to a personal sanctuary I could get.

I holed up there with the full intention of working, but I got off to a slow start. That particular work always left a sour taste in my mouth, so I sweetened my tongue up with a chapter or two (or three; I didn’t exactly count) of Gregory Maguire’s Mirror, Mirror before finally delving into the work.

I finished it. Well, as finished as one could get without internet connection.

In between pages of what I checked and reviewed, I thought about what it was that was bothering me. Nothing clear nor concrete came to mind. Was I feeling inadequate again, the same way I felt after leaving TEDxXS? Or was it something else? Was my spider-sense tingling? What should I have been aware of? Was it my heart breaking? But there was nothing nor no one to break it.

So why then did I feel so worthless today?


One thought on “Not myself

  1. I guess it’s because maybe we just have days that we don’t feel so happy because of something we did before or something we hate ourselves for that we remembered. Then again, that action might be pretty recent too. Anyways, I hope that feeling of yours goes away soon.


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